THE MEXICALI SEX TRADE GUIDE (Beta test version 0.5) By EL CHAMUCO PREAMBLE I posted a Mexicali guide back in 1997 in ASPT, but some changes have taken place in Mexicali ever since and, as a consequence, the guide itself had to be modified. The main change, and perhaps the most important, is the fact that Magic, one of the best strip clubs in Mexicali, was closed down. This used to be a good place to have a beer and, later on, inquire the girls if one of them would go back to a motel with you for a night of entertainment. The information presented in this beta version of the FAQ is quite minimal. It focuses mostly on the one place in Mexicali where you can get laid for sure and for little money: the Bar San Diego. This place works along the lines of the Adelita/Chicago Clubs in Tijuana, but prices aren't as high. A word of warning: None of the places discussed in this FAQ are near the border and in order to get to them you'll are pretty much required to know Spanish and know where you're going. Otherwise be ready to have a hard time. INTRODUCTION This FAQ is aimed at people who are fluent in Spanish and who can drive around in Mexicali. Unfortunatelly it is not that as easy to go to Mexicali as it is in Tijuana. Please note, however, that in order to keep it simple I have focused on giving specific directions and instructions on how to reach the Bar San Diego, which is the surest bet for a good time and a lovely lady. Other places, given the fact that it is a pain in the ass to get there, and they are not as sure a bet as the Bar San Diego will only be mentioned but not described in detail. I. Mexicali. Mexicali is the State capital of Baja California. It is located three hours to the EAST of Tijuana. If you are traveling from the United States you can get there by taking the interstate 8 straight up until you arrive to Calexico, which is the town at the border with Mexicali. Calexico, as a further reference, is right after El Centro in Imperial Valley. Once in Calexico you can either cross the border and get a room in a hotel in Mexicali or you can get a room at the HOLLIE'S hotel in Calexico, which is located on Imperial Avenue and very near the border. From Holly's you can either take a cab to the border (will cost you 2 bucks) or drive yourlsef down to Mexico. I will get into more detail on all of the above later on. II. Major diferences (and similarites) between Mexicali and Tijuana. DIFFERENCES: Those of you familiar with the ASPT FAQ should be aware of the following differences between Mexicali in Tijuana if you are planning on visiting Mexicali. Mexicali is not as American-oriented as TJ. Therefore you'll find MUCH less people fluent in English, and the girls will not be as in Adelita, where they grab your dick to get your attention. The reason is simply that the demand for prostitution--and subsequent competence for patrons--is not as big, and thus not as expected. I cannot stress this enough times: This is a city where your survival DEPENDS on your good spanish, knowledge of Mexican laws, customs and social interaction. Fail at any of these and it can spell disaster. If you feel you are not strong enough on any of the above then you are better off in TJ. In general Mexicali is a very peaceful city (it has a lot less crime than TJ). The weather is hot as hell, but if you know your way around you can have the best of times. 1. Mexicali is not at the border with a major American metropolitan city. Calexico, the border town, is mostly Mexican (seriously), and as a result there is LESS English spoken in Mexicali than in Tijuana. Shall you consider travel to Mexicali, therefore, it is advisable that either you know the language or that you go with a companion fluent in Spanish. 2. Mexicali does NOT rely as much on taxi cabs as Tijuana does. Most of the metropolitan transit system is made up of buses, with some "route" taxis that go back and forth the same route all day. There are call-in cabs from the ECOTAXI company, but you can't just get one on the street--plus they are pricier. More details on this later. This means that in order to move around in Mexicali you will need to drive around in your own car. Sorry, that's the way it is. This implies that you will need to know the city in order to move around. Otherwise your only alternative is to call Ecotaxi every time you go somewhere--and for this you will need Spanish. 3. Unlike at the San Diego/Tijuana area, Calexico does NOT have parking garages where you can leave your car under supervision while you go to Mexicali. This means that you can either take your car with you or get a room at the Hollie's hotel on Imperial avenue and get a cab from there, but that would mean you would have to know how to get a cab in Mexicali--which is not as easy as in Tijuana. 4. While Mexicali does have a "zona roja," located by the border, the best places are actuall far away from the border. The "zona roja" places in Mexicali, quite frankly, do not convice this faithful scribe and are no more than sleazy joints. Avoid them. It is NOT like TJ where the good bars are near each other. 5. Finally: Mexicali has a very nasty climate. During the summer it can get up to 120 degrees and during the winter cold enough to keep a snowman on your front lawn without melting--though it has not snowed in Mexicali since early in the century. SIMILARITIES: Some things are similar in both cities, though: Weapons are not allowed, You can't urinate on the street, and you'll get in quite a mess for making trouble, being offensive to people, or driving under the influence. The city has several drunk-driving check points throughout the city and, specially at night during the hollydays, they get tough on drinking and driving. As you would do in Tijuana, mind your own business, be respectful, obey the local laws and you'll have a great time. III. GETTING THERE. Getting to Calexico is not that complicated. You have to pretty much go straight down on interstate 8 until you reach El Centro. When you reach El Centro keep driving until you find the exit for Calexico. The first thing you'll see in Calexico, aside from the produce fields, is a shopping mall complex (you'll see this to your left). Keep going straight. You will see a street light in an intersection. To the left there will be an AM-PM. From that point on, still going straight, you will see a few convinience stores, some gas stations and all of the major burger joints. You are on Calexico's Imperial avenue. On Imperial avenue, and to your right, you will spot HOLLIE'S hotel. You can either get a room here or keep driving straight until you reach the border. IV. TRANSPORTATION. Again: you should be able to drive around in Mexicali in order to go to the bars. If you do not feel this is satisfactory your only chance is to get a room at the Hollie's and leave your car there. Then you can call a cab in Calexico which can take you either to the border or, for a MUCH higher fee, to any place all the way into Mexicali. THE CABS In Calexico there are a couple of cab services that will pick you up and deliver you wherever you want in the city for 2 bucks. These are BORDERCAB (tel # (619) 357-6161) and CALEXICO TAXI (tel # (619) 357-1119). They park right outside the Greyhond bus station in front of the border--and they will gladly take you back to your room if you cross the border back, but if you are staying at the Hollies then you can call from there and they'll pick you up. They can take you INTO Mexicali and drop you wherever your want, BUT: they charge you a ridiculously high rate for doing this. 20 bucks would NOT be an unusual fee for such trips, so I recommend you NOT to venture to Mexicali all the way from Calexico in a Calexico cab. Although is safe and you'll get to your destination, it is just too damn expensive. In Mexicali most of the cabs follow a route, so you just can't tell the driver to take you to any specific place if it's outside the route. They won't do it for less than 10 bucks. This is NOT a good value given the fact that the route fee is about 50 cents. The alternative is ECOTAXI, which works like the cabs at Calexico. You call them, they pick you up, and they take you wherever you want. The fee, however, depends on the distance. Getting from the border to the Bar San Diego, for example, will cost you at least 45 to 50 pesos. The number for ECOTAXI in Mexicali is 62-65-65. The only problem with Ecotaxi is that they may not pick you up if you are on the street and call from a pay phone. And if they do, they will ask you for your right location. So unless you know where you are EXACTLY you're up for a hard time. ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, HOWEVER: According to a girl from the Bar San Diego the drivers of the Ecotaxi know where the bar is and you won't have a lot of trouble explaining where you want to go. Now, getting back to the border will also require a call to Ecotaxi from the bar. It should not be a problem since the girls at the bar use them all the time, but since I always drive when I'm Mexicali I can't really tell you for sure. V. STAYING IN MEXICALI This would be useful to you IF and only IF you had enough language skills to avoid getting lost. If this is your case then Some of the following Hotels have the Official CHAMUCO SEAL OF APROVAL: Holyday Inn Crown Plaza: Located at what is called the "Centro Civico" (civic center) which is the area near the State government offices. This one is for the Rich and Famous, so I recommend it ONLY if you have shitloads of money to spend. Araiza Inn: Located along Benito Juarez Boulevard. The second most expensive place in Mexicali. Hotel Lucerna: Also along Benito Juarez, but making corner with Avenida Independencia--and right accross the street from a Jack in the Box in Mexicali where you can order BEER with your Jumbo Jacks. Lucerna is my favorite, but it's also expensive. about 100 bucks a night. Hotel Calafia: You gessed right! It's also along Benito Juarez Boulevard, only towards the north. This one is not as expensive (it doesn't have a pool), but I had spent a couple of nights there and it's nice. I haven't been there for almost 11 years now, so I'm not up to date on the prices. All of these hotels are very far away from the port of entry and from any of the cool Clubs, so keep than in mind. **** MAIN COURSE: THE BARS. Bar San Diego is located on Avenida Rio Culiacan adjacent to Motel Las Dunas--which is the hotel where the ladies conduct their business. This is the surest bet for sexual favors in Mexicali. HOW TO GET THERE: According to a lady from Bar San Diego the Ecotaxi drivers know how to get there, but if you are driving here's how you get there. As soon as you cross the border you'll have two alternatives: you can either drive straight along Boulevard Adolfo Lopez Mateos OR you can take the LEFT lane into Avenida Francisco I. Madero. If you want to make things easier for you take Madero. Drive straight along Madero until you reach Avenida Justo Sierra. There you should take your RIGHT. Drive straight until you reach a Boulevard de las Americas (it's either boulevard or avenida de las americas). You will recognize this intersection because there are TWO Pemex gas stations. One on each side of the avenue. The one to your RIGHT has an AM-PM convenience store. At this point turn LEFT and drive straight until your reach Aveinida Rio Culiacan and turn RIGHT. After a few blocks you will see the sign for MOTEL LAS DUNAS. That's the place. NOTE: Parking here is technically insecure because you have to park on the street and nobody is there to watch it for you. Although I have not experienced trouble with thieves here, be aware of what the situation is. The entrance to the bar is a glass door painted black on the inside. You will see painted on the door, with "gothic" type, "Bar San Diego" and "Prohibida la entrada a menores de 18 aņos." Enter the place and get a table--if there is one available. The place is dark and very small (about the size of a living room and a kitchen put together). To your right, as you enter the place, you will see the bar, and to your left you will see a jukebox, the entrance to the restrooms, and the back door leading to the hotel rooms. Once you get a seat wait for the waiters to take your order. The waiters are dressed in suits but without the jacket. NOTE: I have no idea how much or how little they speak English, since I always speak in Spanish. My guess is that they don't speak too much English. When asked about your order ask for a Tecate. The only size of Tecate beer they have is the "ampolleta," which is half the size of the "media" which is what they usually sell at the Tijuana clubs. This size is about 1 cup of beer. Price? About a buck. Tip the waiter another buck, though. It will get him on your side. RECOMMENDATION: The best view of the bar is by the tables next to the jukebox. They have the best view of the bar AND the back door. This is good because then you can see the girls who come in after a session and who were not originally in the bar. Now, you can ask for a session in two ways. You can either ask the waiter to get you a girl (the tip works wonders here) or you can ask the girl yourself. Available girls usually seat alone at the tables waiting for patrons to ask them for a session. They also seat by the back door, but the ones who do that are often waiting for their ride home. The quality of the girls at the Bar San Diego ranges from barely passable to OK to great looking. The best looking girls, of course, are to be found on Friday and Saturday nights. NOTE THIS: The bar opens from 2:00PM to 2:00AM. The best time to be there is from 10:00PM to 12:00AM. After 12:00AM the girls start calling the day off and leave for home. The reason for the business hours is because in Mexicali the bars can not sell alcoholic beverages after 2:00am--and general stores can not sell them past 12:00am. FEES AND PRICES The Bar San Diego charges in Pesos. The fee for the room is 70 pesos (less than 10 bucks), and the ladies may charge you anywhere from 300 to 400 pesos for a 40 minute session. My suggestion is that you should pay in Pesos if they quote you 300 Pesos. The reason for this is that if you don't have pesos you will be charged 40 dollars. 300 Pesos is a few bucks less than 40. Unlike in Tijuana, you do NOT need to tip the ladies afterwards. Of curse, you have to pay up front before the session starts--inside the room, though. Two things can happen once you set up a session. The girl will tell you to go to one of the rooms outside (she'll give you the number) and you'll have to wait for her. Or she'll go with you. Usually the former is the most likely scenario. You'll get to the room, you wait for her a couple of minutes, and then she arrives ready for business. The rooms are very basic: king size bed, a lamp, a chair, and a bathroom. They are also equiped with an AC because they do get really hot during the summer. By the bed two towels and a soap. Unlike the Bars in TJ, the rooms are bult separated from each other on a court adjacent to the bar. There are no corridors to walk, or stairs to climb. It's all done in one floor. GETTING BACK After you're done with your session. You can take a quick shower, go back inside the bar, and either get another lady or go back home. If you decide to go back home and you need a cab, ask the girl if she can call an Ecotaxi for you. She'll probably do so. Tell the driver to take you to "la linea" and walk down and up the stairs going to the Immigration building. If you are driving I suggest you eat something before you drive back into Calexico or you run the risk of pissing off the border agents if you have alcoholic breath. There is a good place to get a quick taco along Justo Sierra called "Jugos Bamoa." To get there drive back to the AM-PM/Pemex station and turn LEFT on Justo Sierra. Drive straight up until you see a place with a taco stand outside. That's the place. It is next to a car dealer. Don't pay with large bills. Pay with nothing larger than 5 Dollar or 50 pesos bills. Another word of caution: Jugos Bamoa starts closing by 2:00am, so your timing here will be crucial. If you'd rather go back to the border right away after your session then drive back straight from where you came from and turn LEFT on de las Americas. Then drive straight and turn RIGHT on Justo Sierra (you'll see the Pemex/AM-PM station) and then straight intil you see the border fence. That will take you to Avenida Cristobal Colon. Turn LEFT there and drive straight until you reach the border crossing. DO NOT take the left lane or you will end up at a return into Mexicali. *** OTHER BARS. The rest of the bars are not as easy to get to, and sexual favors are NOT a guarantee. Still, for the purpose of reference here are some of the best: CLUB ACUARIUS: You'll need to know the city in order to drive to this place. It is located on Boulevard Adolfo Lopez Mateos #1655, next to MOTEL INDIO, and very far from the border. It's a small , blue, one level building with a square neon sign on top that reads CLUB ACUARIUS. The feature you'll notice immediately is the cars parked all over the place. This place gets PACKED. They have a safe private parking area on the back of the building, but if you see a bunch of cars parked all over the place then forget it: it's full and you'll have to park somewhere along the street. Now: they don't have a guy watching the cars, so your car is on it's own after you leave towards the club. In all my years I have never, nor any of my buds, have had any complaints and we have always found our cars intact, but it doesn't hurt to get a little apprehensive. This Club is right now the BEST strip club in Mexicali, and features some of the best looking girls available. They do require you, however, that you consume something if you want to stay inside. Oh, and they have satellite TV where they pass Pat Per View fights and stuff for free for the patrons, but only if it's a big thing, like the Tyson fights and the like. Music goes from cumbias to pop rock, techno and even hard rock depending on the stripper (every one of them dance to the music of their choice). In terms of the entertainment table dances are available upon request, and the stage strip shows are quite hot. The problem is Acuarius new policy does not allow the patrons to fondle the girls --well, you can always put a good ol' one dollar bill inside their panties, but if they feel you're going too far they'll call a bouncer and you'll get kicked out. Sessions are now nearly impossible to get, but you can always ask the waiter to see if there are any girls available. At the very least they do "ficha", which means that they will seat with you and have a drink while watching the show, but that may not be a garantee of a session--it does guarantee, however, that you will have to pay for their drinks. LA CABAņA: This one is located along Lazaro Cardenas Boulevard, towards the south. It's the same deal as ACUARIUS, save for the fact that here there are no table dances. This one is VERY far away from the border. SAMURAY'S: This one is located behind the Plaza Cachanilla shopping mall. The address is Lerdo de Tejada #923, by the Hotel Bahia, which is nearby is used by people at the Samuray's. The only problem is the area in which is located is less than friendly--and MUCH less friendlier than the earea where Bar San Diego is Located. *** FINAL WORDS I would say that the most important difference between Mexicali and Tijuana is the pricing. People thinking about going to Mexicali should be aware that if you are not there for anything OTHER than to look for sex you should stick to Tijuana. The reason is very simple: Tijuana is more American-oriented than Mexicali, and you'll have less difficulty getting laid in TJ than in Mexicali. Mexicali is much more Mexican-oriented and for someone without good Spanish skills, and who does not know his way around the city, it is just too much of a hassle. Nevertheless, if your adventurous spirit burns for taking a trip there, by all means feel free to drop a visit to one of the finest cities in Mexico. This CHAMUCO wishes you the best of lucks.